Riboflavic

Sunday, October 08, 2006

pathmaker


there may lay
many paths
infront of you
some are paved
some are not
some are worn
some are not
some are marked
some are not
some
however
do not exist
until
you choose
to make it so

till the effort is made
till the work is done
to clear the way
to have a path
to walk upon

what work is this
what must we do
for each of us
the answer is different
the question is different
but always
human

the quest for why
or where
or when
or who
even what
answers we seek
and hope are easy
but rarely are

it leaves the brush
the thick growth
of worry
of pain
of love
of shame
of worth
of gain
of nothing
and all that remains
for us to clear
and pull from ground
and open up sky
horizon to see
just knowing
it must be

what it is we rarely know
just simply that we must go
and walk this path
of our own creation
setting upon
a reckless journey
knowing the risk
is part reward
part lesson
part gift
that we share
with those to whom
we mostly care

this path we make
for ourselves
can really be
the gift we give
to ourselves
for which our human soul
requires
as much as our lungs
require air


Friday, June 16, 2006

storm chasing

i am mesmerized
completely
totally
in all of my being

i am a storm chaser
i am drawn
sucked in
by the sheer chaotic beauty
by the wonderful whirlwind
by the pure force of nature

i want to feel it
feel it rush past me
feel it flow through me
feel it push me to the ground
feel it take me
where i can never get on my own

i stand here staring
eyes unblinking
will unwavering
yet legs so weak
barely able to support me

why am i drawn so completely
why do i feel this so stongly
why am i so intoxicated
the taste so rich in my mouth
flavor dripping off my tongue
eyes gently closing beyond all force of will
to keep them open

it is nature
it is natural
it is a pure force
of life
of humanity
of soul
of survival

longing to feel the simplest and purest of rushes
giving in to a pure force of nature
without
holding back
or bracing
for impact

Monday, May 29, 2006

forward motion

they say a shark always has to move
to live
they must have
forward motion

what is that for me
what is my
forward motion

what is my goal
my quest
my
forward motion

what do i need
what do i want
what
forward motion

when will i act
when will i step
when will i move
with
forward motion

what will tomorrow bring
what mirror in which i will look
and see
what is and has become of me
will i have
or lack
forward motion

moments of clarity blur
moments of peace fade
moments of truth
disguise themselves
in the wholeness
that is life
that steadily moves
with
forward motion

what will the ticking clock
remember
of me
of my actions
of my
forward motion


Wednesday, March 29, 2006

necessary

what is necessary
what do we really need
is it simple
or is it complex

air
water
food
shelter

love
faith
purpose
life

we all need
we all feel
we need
this
or that
him
or her
money
or power
space
or air

everyone needs
everyone yearns
for something
or somethings

but what is
truly
necessary

so much we make
into life
and death
that isnt

so much we look
over
that is

is necessary
and need
either right
or wrong
or neither

maybe it just
is

always to
be pondered
wondered
debated
argued
taken
given
tossed
lost
found
just
part of
being
human

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

alone

what is alone

why do we run from it

what drives us from it with such abandon

to lead us into moments so far worse

than loneliness

the darkest of dark

the coldest of cold

the fear of the fearful

yet some yearn for it as light

the air to breathe

the water to drink

the sun to burn the skin

creating spaces

secret spaces

in which to revel in it

to smile in the dark

in the cold

in which others weep











orginally written on March 16th, 2002

Sunday, February 19, 2006

threads


strung upon threads
my life does live
delicately balancing
between them
so thin
so fragile
strength
unseen

how long
do i travel
upon one
or the other
is not always
up to me
bounced
as if
someone
just struck it
while playing a tune
unknown
to me

i yearn
to hold on
tightly
to this
current thread
that i dance upon
lightly
hoping
not to upset
any balance
that may
be there
unkown
to me

yet i want to hear
the tune that is being played
with my life
upon this thread
i crave to sing
aloud
unashamed
uncaring
of just
how out of tune
i might be

wanting to share
wanting to show
the emotion
that lies within
the raw feeling
of everything
that keeps rushing
to just below
the surface
of my
skin

wondering
if they could see
if they would want
to see
what lies
within me
stripped down
to the core
the essence
of what
i feel
singing words
that grip me
tug
the emotion out
along with tears
of everything
of loss
of love
of pain
of joy
of just
being
human
me


treading lightly
upon the threads
of my life
trying to keep
a balance
that i just
cannot
see


Sunday, February 12, 2006

Giver

why did you show me a world
with so much beauty that i never imagined

why did you take my vision of love
and make it so plain
why did you give me all this
then leave me with pain

I would have been fine
just remaining numb
living a simple life
just playing dumb

but you came along
walked into the room
opened my eyes
and teared them so soon

you made me believe
everything was right
with me and my soul
such a wonderful sight

your lies were so sweet
and promises weak
I lived on each word
still when you'd speak

you built up my world
gave it real meaning
then tore it right down
my heart left bleeding

I never saw it coming
I truly believed
could not comprehend
how you could just leave

does it give you any joy
to know I'm this way
barely holding on
to my life every day

I wonder aloud
as I lie in my bed
my pillow bearing witness
to the tears that I shed

there is blame that is mine
my heart letting you in
but having faith in love
is my only true sin

I breathe and I breathe
for the hear and the now
you won't ruin my life
for this I do vow

we danced the dance
I played in your game
but someday I'll love
though I won't be the same

one day I will cherish
a love that is new
and find the one truth
I couldn't get from you

I'll awake each morning
with a purpose to try
stop searching for reasons
of why you chose goodbye

I won't go on living
just trying to cope
I will look to the future
find my reason to hope






*originally written at 12:05am february 12th 2006